God, I want to grab her throat. I want her to look me in the eyes, and show me the look she gets when she is both in love and submitting. I want her to look up at me and realize that she is most comfortable, submitted to me. We are apart, but we are …
Stagnant Sucks
I hate feeling stagnant. I hate spinning my wheels waiting for something to happen. I can plan and prep all day, but until other things happen, I am just forced to wait. It is infuriating. This is the longest time of my life where I didn't feel I was moving forward. Waiting for everything else …
It Is Just Nice
The last 2 days, Kitten and I have texted more than we have in months, since the last time I saw her, honestly. Now, it isn't a sign of anything. No, I don't have any delusions of granger, I won't allow anything to be more, it unless she actually says something in that regard. I …
Ready For Action
I feel like that always. When she tells me she isn't doing well, or having a bad stretch, I am ready. I want to be able to talk to her, listen to her, try to understand and maybe even help a little. She still fights it. She will tell me what's wrong, and then when …
You Will Get Tired
I'm tried too, life does that. It finds a way to just be merciless at the exact wrong time. That is when you dig deeper, gnash your teeth & give life the finger. Then, when you take that next step, watch the fear in life's eyes as you charge on. Life can bruise, but not …
How People Judge You
The math doesn't always work The older I get, the more I find this to be true. I also try very hard to not do this to people who are important to me. Know yourself and how you treat others.
“How Are You, Honestly?”
That wasn't really a question I was ready for, but Kitten asked. We were talking about how she was feeling better, in general. How she has let more anger go, how she is just trying to be happy today. I am happy for her, I really am. But, I wasn't ready for the question. I …
Well…This Was True!
Funny, but true!
Today, Kitten Hurts
She has been for a few weeks now, I knew it. As I said in previous posts, my only job now is to be here when I can, when she lets me. The move has taken its toll, it wasn't really what she wanted to do. Now, she is just miserable. I know Kitten, she …
“How Hard You Can Get Hit”
Life has an incredible was to know when to throw a punch at you, doesn't it. You are dragging yourself back to your feet, or maybe steadying yourself and it comes in like an uppercut. That has been the last few weeks it seems. The last 24 hours, I caught another one in the chin. …