She always was, from the minute I met her. She always was showing me the good in life, the happiness. She showed me undeserved love when I felt unlovable. She showed time and again she would endure the hardest things for me. She was a friend and my girl. She was the Angel that saved me.
Now, we aren’t a couple. She isn’t “my girl”, but she is an amazing friend and she is still saving me everyday. She has put so many feelings to bed to take care of me, and take care of herelf, which I can not tell you how much I love to see that.
We are “just friends” and that is enough. Maybe we can be a couple again some day, maybe we can’t. But, everyday she is right there making sure I am ok. I need to do the same for her, now more than ever. Just be me, and let her be her. Share our day, share our happy, share our sad. Like friends and people who love each other do.
I used to think I focused on her too much when things got hard, and the reality is, I didn’t turn to her. I just focused on things I didn’t have, we didn’t have. But I forgot what we did have, a bond like no other, a love that was not judgemental, or harsh, but pure and beautiful. It was a love that fufilled us beyond anything, and was the true foundation of everything. I forgot all of that when I was low, and I didn’t take care of it.
Yeah, Angel had to make changes for her. She had to let some things go with me. But she never stopped loving me. I never stopped loving her. So, it is different and thats good. We have a beautful friendship, and honestly, it is enough. I just need to learn to focus on that when I am scared or missing her.
I would spend forever with Angel, just as we are. I know that. I don’t need anything more than Angel. I don’t need anything more than her love in my life. Because that is what always made me btter, and make me want to give her my entire heart.
I can’t look at forever, not right now. I need to look at today, and tomorrow. I need to find the happiness in what we have, and when things get hard just talk to her, and let her talk to me when she needs to. She is my third love, and I know that is enough, even if it is different now.
However she views me, Angel will always be my person. She will always be the one I know will have my back, and the one I want nothing more than absolute happiness for. I love her, her brain, her beauty, her amazing sense of humor, but mostly, her amazing heart. She never see’s herself, the way I do. I hope someday she does, and I can show her more of why I do as well.
“To my Angel, Thank you. Thank you for still seeing the good in me, for standing by me, supporting me and loving me. Thank you for dealing with the hardest parts of me, knowing the best parts of me are still there somewhere. Thank you for being he laugh when I need it, the sun when I need it and the kick in the ass when I need it. I only hope to someday give you all of the same and more t show you how much I truly love and apprecaite you. You are, without a doubt, the most beautiful person I have ever met insade and out. I love you, thank you for saving me 3 years ago, today and tomorrow. You have no idea what you mean to me.”