Before you can finish a marathon or hike a mountain, you have to take the first step. That has been my mindset through the last few weeks, regarding earning trust back from Kitten. I knew this would be a long journey, and I am actually glad it is. It is making me appreciate so much more I think.
Yesterday started rough, as sleep was at a minimum. But, as the day wore on, I felt better. Kitten and I texted and chatted, and I got a few more pictures of her. I have said before how much those mean to me everyday, because it lets me see her beautiful face and her eyes. Here eyes always tell me how she feels.
Then, we just had a much more normal conversation. We talked dinner and an upcoming trip she is taking. She was just more talkative than she had been, and I felt it. Is this a step? Maybe a small one, and I am thankful for it.
The biggest highlight, inside of the talking, was that she called me “Handsome”. That was always the pet name she called me that made me feel the best day in and day out. Yes, she called me “Sir” but that was different, and not a pet name.
But, Handsome, was like a pet name and a hug at once. She calls me baby with regularity, and I love that too. Baby can be said with so much other emotion than just happy. If she was stressed, aggravated or sad, “baby” would match that emotion via voice inflection.
But handsome, I don’t know how to describe how that was always one that just warmed me. It was always said in a loving way. I guess it is hard to call someone “Handsome” when you are telling them what a rough day you had, lol. “Damn it, Handsome, This asshole cut me off” just doesn’t seem to convey the same frustration. I was just thankful for that to have been said, because I missed it. I could hear it when she texted it, too.
Unfortunately, Kitten slept terrible last night. I am sure it is the stress and anxiety of everything that is going on. I hate that she didn’t sleep well,I haven’t been sleeping well at all and I know what a toll is takes on your mind and body when you are exhausted.
I hope her day gets better, I hope that both of us have a great day. Little bits at a time, right?