I have never wanted to right my wrongs so much in Life. I have never wanted to fix what I have broken so badly. I am determined to show my Kitten, that she is my Kitten. That I am her Sir. That if she forgives me and gives me a chance, I will protect her heart forever in my hands. I will take her, put her where she belongs around my thigh, and never let here even think about moving. I will show her that is her spot, and she never has to worry about letting go again.
Kitten called me this morning while she was out running errands. I was asleep (time change), and I heard her ring tone and about jumped up. It is weird how that call is still a gift. It always has been. With our crazy lives, even before all of this, our phone calls where limited. But every time I hear that ringtone, I always smile because I know I get to hear the voice that I crave to hear constantly.
We talked for a few, and she was getting to where she was going and let me go so I could go back to sleep. Then, no less than an hour or so later, I popped awake. My first thought was her.
My first thought is always her, and has been since I met her. Sick, tired, rushing or any other factor in my morning never changes that she is my first thought. Usually, it is her eyes. I can almost see her beautiful green eyes looking at me when I wake up. I can not tell you how many days that probably saved so many hard mornings.
I had this pit in my stomach and I had to get up right way. I don’t know why, but it hit me like a train. I just needed to tell her how much I missed her and how much I need her. I texted her and told her, and told her she didn’t need to respond. But I just needed her to know.
I just need the chance, if she gives me that, I will prove myself once more. I will show her, that she is the absolute everything to my world, and I will love and adore her how she deserves. I just need the chance.